Do you remember "Where is Waldo?" from when you were younger? Do you remember searching through a claustrophobic beach scene for his signature red and white striped shirt? And then once you finally found him you wondered how it took you so long. It's like those seemingly millions of little sunbathers and beach umbrellas never existed. You just see Waldo and his stripes.
If you're like me, you found your "Waldo" by dividing your life into chronological chunks. Lessons learned by age 16: don't drink tequila like it's water unless you want alcohol poisoning that will haunt you for five years. Lessons learned by age 18: life is not over because you didn't get accepted into your "dream" college. Shockingly, there is a world that exists outside of high school. And you will gradually lose touch with friends you thought would be in your wedding. Most of your "best friends" will become strangers.
And a few lessons learned by 21:
1. Not every relationship or friendship is meant to be anything other than temporary.
2. You can't expect to always get what you give. People will disappoint you - more than once if you let them.
3. True friends are extremely hard to find. Appreciate these people and keep them around. Quality > quantity.
4. Being single is liberating and so underrated. You'll be okay if there's nobody to text at the moment.
5. There are too many options in this world to settle for mediocrity. Too many places to go if you hate where you live, too many guys to date if your boyfriend is a dick.
6. Don't cheat on a significant other and never lie to those who love
you. It's easier to heal from being hurt than to forgive yourself for hurting someone else.
7. Trust is not only difficult to establish but also impossible to get back once it's lost.
8. There is nothing appealing or interesting about pretending to be perfect. These people are boring.
9. Try as you might, you cannot change someone to fit your expectations or ideals. People are who they are, and change will occur, if at all, on their terms only.
10. Lastly, you can love someone with your entire being and it will not be enough.
Eventually, when enough time has gone by and you've learned your lessons, you will get an idea of what (and who) is important. All those trials and errors, though painful and confusing, will lead to many moments of clarity. And maybe, if you're like me, you'll look back and feel slightly dumb for not having seen it all along. It's like looking at every inch of the page and finally resting your tired eyes on Waldo. Maybe it took you thirty seconds or maybe it took you an hour - but you found him. And what's the point of "Where is Waldo?" if there are no obstacles that make him so hard to find?